Dating start with goal setting
I did like him and I did want to keep seeing him but the prospect of making it official just didn’t feel right at that point in the relationship and I desperately wished he would just drop the issue and let things happen rather than forcing them to.The more he pestered me, the more turned off I got and the more I resisted allowing him to brand me with a dreaded label.One thing I’ve noticed is that guys don’t bounce back from breakups as easily as us gals do.They can’t just dive right into the next relationship which is why, I’m sure you’ll notice, the guys that won’t call you their girlfriends are usually still licking their wounds from a previous breakup. Eric does a great job explaining what might be going on in your guy’s mind but I have some insights that, although from a female perspective, will be of great value as well. The experience caused me to completely shut down emotionally.I was aloof, I was hard to read, I didn’t get too close, I was present but never available, essentially, I was a guy (in the psychological sense anyway! My ‘guy’ behavior caused the actual guys was seeing to take on the ‘girl role’ and they were always way more into it than I was (this was also due to my aforementioned heartbreak which rendered me numb).When a guy won’t call you his girlfriend it doesn’t always mean he doesn’t like you or that he never will.
I fed him the usual crap, the sort that had been fed to me by guys so many times before: ‘I like things how they are, why mess with everything?I wasn’t so much flattered by his eagerness as I was concerned by his desperation.I mean, why did this guy want a girlfriend so badly? Is he so insecure that he I did like D from the beginning, and I may have grown to really like him if he had given me the chance rather than trying to force me into feeling how he wanted me to feel when he wanted me to feel it.I felt very uncomfortable and resentful, not to mention furious with myself for caving in which I couldn’t undo, and it just got very ugly from there.The reason I felt compelled to share this experience is I think it may help to see things from the other side.