Dating advice crazy women rob gordons dating philosophy
I don't mind if you tend to date fat girls, or really even if you get some specific pleasure from being with a fat woman -- but I don't need that to be the first thing you tell me about yourself. " It's announced as if it's supposed to reassure me that they aren't going to take one look at me naked and run, I think? Or maybe it's meant to suggest some kink; like to let me know that he wants to feed me cakes and watch me weigh myself? If you care more about my weight than I do, we're going to have a problem. "You're not the kind of lazy, stupid, disgusting, [insert sizeist insult here] slob who I expect fat people to be," is not a compliment.Dudes tend to assume that I haven't dated a lot in my life -- or the opposite, that I'm always up for casual sex because I'm desperate for attention. Who else but a crazy person goes over the last five hours of conversations or the last several weeks of dating with a fine-toothed comb to discover any hidden agendas, potential problems, references, inferences, meanings, between the lines subtext, Because we are aware that we’re on a tightrope and we can’t get off it alone! It doesn’t mean we are crazy, unhinged, psycho, nuts, toxic, or an actual hot mess. Back away.”Having been there it’s like we are bomb squad and we know the drill. Are we ready for this level of commitment, I mean a you. And then, through the loving support of our close friends—we can get back to ourselves. But for that night, day, or moment: “No, do NOT text him back 16 times right now to explain why you left a weird voicemail/email/PM/etc.” “STEP AWAY from social media.” “Put the phone down. STOP.” “Do NOT tell him off because he didn’t text you back, not right now.” “Put down the device slowly.Dating as a polyamorous woman brings with it a lifetime's worth of misconceptions and jealousies.Add a few extra layers of fat to that experience, and things can get depressing real fast.
And yes, I even enjoy going out for a good meal if you can manage not to make a big deal out of it. I mean, as much as I adore Greg Behrendt (and here's the proof), they can't all possibly be "just not that into us" . I wrote a blog post called What (Most) Women Really Want, and all you have to do is scroll down to the comments section to see firsthand the giant Grand Canyon-sized gap between what expectations women have and what expectations men are willing to meet.As a non-single, fat, polyamorous woman, I can't tell you how often I've been questioned about my confidence, self-worth, who I am, and why I'm into what I'm into.If literally the only reason you are interested in me is because I'm fat, you might want to take a step back and get to know a bit about me first. When you tell me I'm not, what you are really saying is that despite my body size, I'm not all those horrible things you tend to associate with fatness.